It's not about you
Have you ever been in a conversation where your intent was just to share some interesting information to generate some lively conversation – and found that it got hijacked? And that what could have been a very interesting exchange turned into an “it’s all about me” conversation? What happened to good old-fashioned listening skills – ones where the receiver of information sits back and objectively listens to the story – without interjecting?!?
This recently happened to me – and it was an incredibly disappointing experience. So much so that I ended the conversation prematurely and contemplated never sharing interesting information with this person ever again. (I should have known better though, since this person is a known hijacker…) I should have been smarter – I know these people from experience since I spend a great majority of my day listening to people. I don’t usually share a lot…
I think we have all been hijackers at some point in time. You know, those conversations where someone is sharing a story and you have one that you JUST KNOW is way better, so you have this INCREDIBLE urge to share it in order to one up the person? And in the end, you effectively shut them up from sharing in the rest of the conversation. Why do you do it? Is it to put them down and belittle their story? Is it to make yourself look so much better – whatever better means? Or is it because your communication skills just suck and you simply cannot listen?
If you are a hijacker, my challenge to you is to close your mouth, quiet your thoughts, and just listen to the person in front of you. You might learn something. You might have more respect for that person. You might build a better friendship with that person. If you don’t – you might lose that person…
Brenda is the owner/operator of Owl & Acorn Well-Being. All opinions are just that - opinions. We hope you enjoy!